Chadwick's Blog

Today, I had an eye exam for contact lenses. This event has excited me to no end. Before today, I had had one eye exam ever, and that was the beginning of my senior year of high school (Fall '97). Since then, I've had the same pair of glasses. I have astigmatism (not to mention red-green colorblindness!) and my vision has deteriorated in the past six years. I was giddy during my eye exam. The optometrist flipped around the lenses in front of my eyes in succession, asking me step by step which was better. At the end of it, he asked me to read the bottom line of the eye chart across the room, as I peered through the eye machine. And you know what? I read that little line at the bottom, no problems, no doubts. I am ecstatic at the thought of the quality of vision once I pop those little lenses into my eyeballs. Those lenses will be nothing short of a revolution. Finally, I can look across the room and know a) whether that girl is smiling at me and b) whether I want to smile back. Hallelujah. Praise Yahweh. I will be given the gift of sight.

As part of the exam, the doctor had to dilate my pupils. I did not enjoy that part of the process. Or, should I say, I disliked the after-effects. Three hours of having 98% pupil, 2% iris. They gave me some cheap shades to protect me from the sunlight. I took them off after Nicole picked me up from the doctor and Nicole shrieked. I looked like an alien, or a monster, or a cartoon character, or some combination thereof. And, it left me with a headache, and worse vision than usual.

I feel stupid for having put this exam off for so long. I have squinted in a blurry haze for years. No more. Now, I will walk into a room, strike up a conversation with a compatriot, see an insect on the far wall and say, "Hey compatriot, see that bug over there? Well, I do. Victory is mine. But first, sweet slumber.

p.s. Last night was the most insane experience, ever. My friends were transmogrified into beasts, and I danced in awe.